Ready for Spring!

The First Day of Spring arrives tomorrow ... and I feel I am finally ready for it!

What is there to be ready for you ask? Well -- everything! Spring is the time of rejuvenation and hope. And for a gardener like myself, the idea of seeing fresh green growth and new flower buds forming on trees and shrubs alike is very uplifting. Thus, my own feeling of spiritual growth as well as blossoming with new found wisdom fits in so aptly to the arrival of this new season.

There is that old saying of doing a bit of "Spring cleaning" ... although my cupboards still require my attention, my mind is tidy for the first time this year. Over the last week I have taken a leave of absence from work and used the time to sort out the priorities in my life. I usually do this at the beginning of each calendar year ... as the New Year brings with it a sense of freshness perfect for re-prioritising as well as dreaming about the things I would like to do. However, the loss of my Brother-in-law so soon into 2009 left me little time to follow my usual rituals.

It is true that you don't know the value of something until you lose it, or nearly in my case. A couple of weeks ago I had to face the thought of losing my job after spending some much of my time and energy over the last 9 months to prove that I was good at it. I also had to reflect on the sacrifices my family had made during this time for a result that would not eventuate. It was a heartbreaking experience. On the final day of my contract I was offered an extension for three months. Instead of feeling a sense of relief, I felt confused.

Today I am to discuss my position with my supervisor ... but I have already made changes in my life whereby work is not first on my priority list. The simple inclusion of a 3km jog each morning for my own fitness indicates that my perspective has been altered by this experience. I am positive I can go back to living out my own belief system of family first!

Finding happiness

Yesterday I was asked by a few friends to divulge my secret to finding happiness ... on the condition that I found it first, of course!

There has been a little turbulence in my life of late, but nothing within my "sphere of control" ... so I feel slightly battered and bewildered by the experience. My attempt to regain control over my life began on Monday. What did I do first? Sleep! At 8 o'clock in the morning I returned to my cosy, comfortable bed and stayed there for 4 hours whilst my understanding and supportive husband looked after the kids. Heaven!

Turbulence in my world hit immediately after my glorious sleep ... Thus, my first attempt to gain control had failed. What to do now? Well, instinct took over -- I indulged in a caffiene, chocolate and whinge fix! The phone cord was subsequently removed from its socket to prevent further communication with the outside world. Breathe girl!

Walking around the rest of the day with my head in the clouds of denial did wonders for my mood. To hide myself away I progressed through the list of mundane things that needed doing around the house. The evening was not spent over-analysing my present circumstances either, as my husband encouraged me to enter a tennis tournament (on the Wii). Thus the night was spent energetically whipping the Williams' sisters at their game!

On Tuesday morning I found myself with renewed enthusiasm for life. After walking the kids to school I ran 3kms for the first time in 9 months! Fruit and plenty of water followed ... a better instinct had kicked in. We're now into Tuesday evening and I have succumbed to two strong coffees and a dose of birthday shopping. So, has happiness found me yet? Not yet, but I am working on it!

My advice for finding happiness:
1. Don't acknowledge yor unhappiness in the first place.
2. Avoid people and the world news at all costs.
3. Housework is a sure way to find unhappiness.
4. Shopping for others makes spending money okay, but it doesn't help.
5. Going outside to enjoy nature is fraught with the danger of finding your garden full of weeds.
6. Walking the dog may indeed be a good deed, but stopping at every pole may become rather irritating.
7. Constant whinging in your friends' ears may find you in need of new friends.
8. All extended family tensions and issues should be left alone.
9. Researching the web for quick-fixes may leave you feeling more out-of-sorts than you did initally.
10. Please don't take any of these seriously as my tongue is firmly pushed into the side of my mouth!

Happy hunting ❤❤❤

Living with gratitude

Just over a year ago a little boy lost his life-long battle with cancer. He was 18 months of age. For two months I had been following his story from the amazingly detailed and brave words of his Mother ... when he needed to be rushed to hospital I couldn't keep my mind off him and his family; when blood test results returned with such positive news I became overjoyed and optimistic; and when sudden news came of his final days I was deeply shocked and truly devastated.

This event shook up the way I viewed my life and my family. My determination to live every day with gratitude became a priority.

I am not a person who believes we need to compare our lives to those less fortunate in order to be grateful. My memories as a child of being told there were starving children in Africa did not influence the way I felt about those cold broad beans on my plate. Instead, I became sad about the existence such hungry children.

What I do believe is that each person's issues and concerns are just as valid and real as the next. Instead, it is how we allow these issues and concerns to control our thoughts and behaviour that determines our attitude to life. Friends of ours have a unique way to express their gratitude on a daily basis. As they gather together to enjoy a family dinner, each member is asked to examine their day and state what it is they are grateful for. My family shared this experience on one occasion and found it to be very positive and uplifting.

Recently an event occurred whereby my trust and respect for an integral person in my life was seriously damaged. As I parked my car in the car park the following morning, I was focused on trying to hide my hurt and disappointment. Suddenly I noticed a bird no more than 2 metres away from me. I watched as a pink-and-grey galah eyed me briefly before continuing to dance its way along a path, cheerily picking up seeds as it went. This simple pleasure enabled me to walk through the door I had been dreading to do just minutes earlier and I braved another day.

My thoughts remain with Blake's family as they come to grips with life without their precious boy. Today, I am grateful for the reminder that each day is a blessing and to make the most of what you have ...

All my love, Tara ❤❤❤